"Everything depends upon execution; having just a vision is no solution.
"Stephen Sondheim
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The Principle Of Agreement
Dale Carnegie, author of the classic, "How to Win Friends and Influence People" <http://www.amazon.com> eloquently taught that there is no winning an argument. It makes sense, doesn't it? After all, if you lose on merit, you've lost. However, even if you win on merit (showing the other person that you are right and they are wrong), you most likely still won't get them to take the action you want. Why? Because their ego; that all-important decision-making instrument indigenous to the human being, has been insulted. When that is the case, know that although you may be able to convince, rarely will you persuade.
So, what do you do when the other person says something you know is wrong? Well, agree. At first, anyway. This can be a wonderful way to disarm the person who, most likely, expects you to argue. But you aren't doing that. You are agreeing. And, this leads to what I call The Principle of Agreement: "Nobody is going to argue...with himself." Think of it - after agreeing with him or her, might they respond by defiantly saying, "No, you're wrong, I was wrong!" :-) I don't think so.
Now, at this point, you'll go into some of the other methods of positive persuasion we've discussed often and will continue to. (If you've been printing out your issues you can go back and find plenty; certainly too many to list here.) A couple of good "bridge phrases" you can use are "I'm wondering if..." or "Here's what I'm thinking..." and then make your suggestion. The key is, you've effectively brought down the other person's defenses and made them much more amenable to your point of view. Positive persuasion is now within reach.
Do you agree? If not, agree anyway...before you persuade me otherwise, that is. :-)
Bob Burg Proper credit of "Bob Burg is author of "Winning Without Intimidation: How to Master the Art of Positive Persuasion"
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The Principle Of Agreement
Dale Carnegie, author of the classic, "How to Win Friends and Influence People" <http://www.amazon.com> eloquently taught that there is no winning an argument. It makes sense, doesn't it? After all, if you lose on merit, you've lost. However, even if you win on merit (showing the other person that you are right and they are wrong), you most likely still won't get them to take the action you want. Why? Because their ego; that all-important decision-making instrument indigenous to the human being, has been insulted. When that is the case, know that although you may be able to convince, rarely will you persuade.
So, what do you do when the other person says something you know is wrong? Well, agree. At first, anyway. This can be a wonderful way to disarm the person who, most likely, expects you to argue. But you aren't doing that. You are agreeing. And, this leads to what I call The Principle of Agreement: "Nobody is going to argue...with himself." Think of it - after agreeing with him or her, might they respond by defiantly saying, "No, you're wrong, I was wrong!" :-) I don't think so.
Now, at this point, you'll go into some of the other methods of positive persuasion we've discussed often and will continue to. (If you've been printing out your issues you can go back and find plenty; certainly too many to list here.) A couple of good "bridge phrases" you can use are "I'm wondering if..." or "Here's what I'm thinking..." and then make your suggestion. The key is, you've effectively brought down the other person's defenses and made them much more amenable to your point of view. Positive persuasion is now within reach.
Do you agree? If not, agree anyway...before you persuade me otherwise, that is. :-)
Bob Burg Proper credit of "Bob Burg is author of "Winning Without Intimidation: How to Master the Art of Positive Persuasion"
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"Some people plant in the spring and leave in the summer. If you've signed up for a season, see it through. You don't have to stay forever, but at least stay until you see it through.
" Jim Rohn
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"The Person You Choose To Be With Should Support Your Dreams and Respect Your Values"
Being accepted is a requirement in all relationships. Nobody wants to be with someone who rejects them for what they believe, or judges them for certain traits of their personality.
You're entitled to your own decisions, beliefs, goals, etc. When someone truly loves you, they love the whole package you come in. This includes the physical you, the emotional you and the dreams and values that come along with you.
After all, that's the true beauty of being an individual. And, the one you choose to be with should be grateful.
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"The Person You Choose To Be With Should Support Your Dreams and Respect Your Values"
Being accepted is a requirement in all relationships. Nobody wants to be with someone who rejects them for what they believe, or judges them for certain traits of their personality.
You're entitled to your own decisions, beliefs, goals, etc. When someone truly loves you, they love the whole package you come in. This includes the physical you, the emotional you and the dreams and values that come along with you.
After all, that's the true beauty of being an individual. And, the one you choose to be with should be grateful.
-Meditations For Women-
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"Follow up and follow through until the task is completed, the prize won."
Brian Tracy
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