"The most splendid achievement of all is in the constant striving to surpass yourself and to be worthy of your own approval."
Denis Waitley
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Not Help; "Advice"
In Joe Tye's book, "Personal Best: 1001 Great Ideas for Achieving Success in Your Career" <http://www.johnwiley.com>, he quotes William Moran and James Cabrera. In their book, "Parting Company" <http://www.amazon.com>, they advise, "Never ask for a job; always ask for suggestions. Don't ask for favors; ask for advice."
Although, in this case, the authors are referring to those with whom one is networking in order to find a job, their suggestion holds for most other areas of wwi, as well. When you need help from someone, anyone, and that person is not obligated to help you (nor do you know at this point whether they are even interested in such), you'll find that asking for advice instead of a favor/direct help is often an excellent way to acquire both.
When I was just a few years into my speaking business there was one particular company I very much wanted as a client. I was constantly frustrated in my attempts to reach a decision-maker because, in this case, the company was so large, it was extremely difficult to even find out who it was; not to mention knowing the correct approach.
Eventually, I learned of a person in a different field who had them as a client. I knew him only indirectly, and (based on several factors) felt that to ask him *directly* for help via a referral or personal introduction would be inappropriate at that time.
Instead, I asked him for advice. I said, "Tom, I understand that 'XYZ' company is a client of yours. I've been trying to get them as a client for some time now, with no success. First, please know that I am absolutely not asking you for a referral. I'm just wondering if you could give me some advice on how to go about learning who to contact in the first place and the best way to reach that person."
Well, Tom did much more than that. He actually introduced me to the decision-maker by way of a telephone call, and that company became a huge client of mine for several years. I truly believe that had I come right out and asked Tom for help, he would have found that to be presumptuous and resisted. But, since I merely asked for advice, he was all too happy to take the next step. Again, this works in all types of situations and, in my opinion, for two main reasons.
One is that people don't mind being asked for and giving advice but don't necessarily enjoy being asked to hand over the fruits of their years of hard work. The second reason is that being asked feels good. Most people enjoy feeling as though they might make a difference in someone's life so, when someone humbly asks for advice, they're only too happy to provide it.
Note: There are times when coming right out and asking for direct help is totally appropriate. The above situation just didn't happen to be one of those times. If you feel that is the case, then simply ask for advice.
Bob Burg
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Not Help; "Advice"
In Joe Tye's book, "Personal Best: 1001 Great Ideas for Achieving Success in Your Career" <http://www.johnwiley.com>, he quotes William Moran and James Cabrera. In their book, "Parting Company" <http://www.amazon.com>, they advise, "Never ask for a job; always ask for suggestions. Don't ask for favors; ask for advice."
Although, in this case, the authors are referring to those with whom one is networking in order to find a job, their suggestion holds for most other areas of wwi, as well. When you need help from someone, anyone, and that person is not obligated to help you (nor do you know at this point whether they are even interested in such), you'll find that asking for advice instead of a favor/direct help is often an excellent way to acquire both.
When I was just a few years into my speaking business there was one particular company I very much wanted as a client. I was constantly frustrated in my attempts to reach a decision-maker because, in this case, the company was so large, it was extremely difficult to even find out who it was; not to mention knowing the correct approach.
Eventually, I learned of a person in a different field who had them as a client. I knew him only indirectly, and (based on several factors) felt that to ask him *directly* for help via a referral or personal introduction would be inappropriate at that time.
Instead, I asked him for advice. I said, "Tom, I understand that 'XYZ' company is a client of yours. I've been trying to get them as a client for some time now, with no success. First, please know that I am absolutely not asking you for a referral. I'm just wondering if you could give me some advice on how to go about learning who to contact in the first place and the best way to reach that person."
Well, Tom did much more than that. He actually introduced me to the decision-maker by way of a telephone call, and that company became a huge client of mine for several years. I truly believe that had I come right out and asked Tom for help, he would have found that to be presumptuous and resisted. But, since I merely asked for advice, he was all too happy to take the next step. Again, this works in all types of situations and, in my opinion, for two main reasons.
One is that people don't mind being asked for and giving advice but don't necessarily enjoy being asked to hand over the fruits of their years of hard work. The second reason is that being asked feels good. Most people enjoy feeling as though they might make a difference in someone's life so, when someone humbly asks for advice, they're only too happy to provide it.
Note: There are times when coming right out and asking for direct help is totally appropriate. The above situation just didn't happen to be one of those times. If you feel that is the case, then simply ask for advice.
Bob Burg
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"Successful people begin where failures leave off. Never settle for 'just getting the job done.' Excel!"
Tom Hopkins
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A purpose that is you
With a clear and meaningful purpose will come the motivation and the energy to follow that purpose. When you're sure of the what and the why, you'll find everything necessary to handle the how.
Do you have trouble staying motivated, or keeping yourself focused, or following through on your commitments? With a compelling purpose, those troubles disappear.
Are you worried and anxious about how you'll do what you need to do? With a deep sense of purpose, those worries and anxieties give way to valuable, positive ideas and effective action.
There is a purpose, there is a why, that can bring every aspect of your life to higher and higher levels of performance and experience. You've glimpsed that purpose in moments of pure joy, those times when everything in life just seemed to be flowing perfectly.
Dive deep into who you are and connect yourself to a purpose that is uniquely and overwhelmingly you. Seek to know and live a purpose so positive, powerful and compelling that you cannot let go of it.
Already you have seen bits and pieces of that purpose at times, even if somewhat dimly. Just imagine what you could do if you were to include that powerful purpose in every moment.
Imagine it, and then let yourself make it so. Your highest and best purpose is ready to be lived.
Ralph Marston
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A purpose that is you
With a clear and meaningful purpose will come the motivation and the energy to follow that purpose. When you're sure of the what and the why, you'll find everything necessary to handle the how.
Do you have trouble staying motivated, or keeping yourself focused, or following through on your commitments? With a compelling purpose, those troubles disappear.
Are you worried and anxious about how you'll do what you need to do? With a deep sense of purpose, those worries and anxieties give way to valuable, positive ideas and effective action.
There is a purpose, there is a why, that can bring every aspect of your life to higher and higher levels of performance and experience. You've glimpsed that purpose in moments of pure joy, those times when everything in life just seemed to be flowing perfectly.
Dive deep into who you are and connect yourself to a purpose that is uniquely and overwhelmingly you. Seek to know and live a purpose so positive, powerful and compelling that you cannot let go of it.
Already you have seen bits and pieces of that purpose at times, even if somewhat dimly. Just imagine what you could do if you were to include that powerful purpose in every moment.
Imagine it, and then let yourself make it so. Your highest and best purpose is ready to be lived.
Ralph Marston
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